Which Freedoms Will You Work and Fight For?

We’ve all heard that freedom isn’t free. We have to work and fight for it. But too often, we hear the “fight” part and not the “work” part. That means we start to choose just one of two alternatives (yours vs mine) instead of looking for more options. Worse, we might think that freedom is only a fight, and not work.

This week, just before the US July Fourth holiday, let’s reconsider all the ways we might think about freedom.

While I will use a personal example, all the ideas here also apply to our professional lives and politics.

A Working Definition of Freedom

Freedom is about our ability to make reasonable choices for now. Maybe not forever, but for now. Because no one is imprisoning us or otherwise enslaving us, we can create reasonable options for our lives.

While some people like to create more and more options, some people close off their options too early, before they consider which options might create more freedom for everyone.

How Many Options Do You Need?

Most of us need some options in our lives. I’m one of those people who do not want to make too many decisions about the “little” things in life. I already made my choices for breakfast, lunch, and what to wear most days. While I can change my mind—and often do for vacation eating—I tend to go with my few choices.

Those regular choices reduce my decision fatigue.

However, when we discuss options that affect other people, I tend to ask this question:

• How many ways can we each achieve what we want? (That’s another example of using the Rule of Three.)

Mark and I have this problem with our vacations. I am physically unable to do many of the activities he wants to do. Do I want to hold him back? No. Does he want to force me into a physically unsafe position? Absolutely not.

We create options that work for us. Even though we travel to the same location, we don’t always do the same thing at the same time. That’s one example of creating a different option. It works for us because we do not enforce many traditional constraints as a couple and as individuals.

More Options Might Create More Freedom

This idea of separating activities, even when we are together, is also very freeing. We are not constrained by what other people think an ideal vacation is. We know that what is ideal for other people is probably not ideal for us. Even better, more options help us consider even more activities.

Because we believe in more options, we also don’t denigrate the other person’s preferences. This is a way of working through the problem, not fighting over the “right” way to do something. Too often, that “One Right Way” prevents people from fighting through the problem.

Instead of bemoaning our constraints—my abilities or lack thereof—we choose to create a different perspective.

That takes work.

Work Takes Time to Solve the Problem Right

As I navigate the world, I have more opportunities to learn what I can and cannot do. That allows me to clarify which options might work for me and how much support I might need for each.

That’s why I think of freedom as a range of possibilities. Mark and I use power with, to create more options that we both want. We tend to expand the possibilities before narrowing anything down. Yes, more options might mean more work. But that’s a small price to pay for freedom.

Let’s all take the time we need to choose the freedoms we will work and fight for.

If you are wondering why I say this applies to politics, watch Understanding the Declaration of Independence.

I wish all of us a healthy and happy July 4th.