How to Acknowledge Our Disappointment and Decide How to Restart

We’ve all had terrible disappointments in our lives, personal, professional, and societal. Somehow, most of us find ways to live with the personal disappointments. I’m not going to discuss those because I’m not a therapist.

Professionally, I’ve experienced several project-based disappointments. We either didn’t deliver what the customer wanted or we didn’t deliver it when the customer wanted it. Sometimes, it was both of those, and the project team imploded afterward, and people quit.

That was bad.

And last night, the election outcome disappointed me. Since we are almost an evenly divided country, the election was bound to disappoint about half the voters. Think about that for a few seconds. Regardless of the outcome, half the electorate was bound to be disappointed.

That’s a lot of people. Either way.

That’s why I’m using the Satir Change model to acknowledge and continue.

Review the Satir Change Model

All of us just experienced a significant Foreign Element. Presidential elections are bound to be a Foreign Element, but this one was a doozy. That’s because the two visions of the United States are so dramatically different.

I’m in Chaos, wondering what the heck will happen. We do have a transition period now, so we might learn something. But until Trump is inaugurated, we won’t know much.

That’s a long time to be in Chaos.

Instead of staying in Chaos for all that time, I’m using my adaptability and resilience to choose what to focus on my circle of control. That means I’m starting with me, my family, and my professional part of the world. While I might have greater concerns, I clearly can’t do anything about them.

What Can You Control?

I can control the actions I take for my physical and mental health. That includes what I write, when, and how I publish. I can choose to be present for my family in various ways. In addition, I have some professional influence in my professional community.

Since I have little influence on national politics, I will vote in all the local and state elections with the hope of preparing for change. That’s the only way I can influence the national decisions.

And, I will continue to speak with people who do not agree with me. Not to fight with them, but to understand them and invite them to understand me. Especially around climate change, women’s health, and the various wars going on.

Decide How You Will Restart

You might decide you have an appetite for much more work in the larger sphere. Good for you! You might find the interplay between adaptability and resilience helpful.

As with all great disappointments, we need to start with acknowledgment. Then, use our adaptability and resilience to see what we can and cannot control. That will allow us to act.

I decided to limit my actions. Since you are probably younger than I am, feel free to do more. But choose where to start or restart. That’s the way to use our disappointment to make the world a better place.